It's interesting how as spiritual beings having a "human" experience, all we want is to be seen, heard and understood. And yet at the same time, our biggest fear is being seen, heard, and truly "understood". We are afraid of what will happen if someone truly sees us and rejects us when they "see" us.
How does the rest of your fear sentence go?
What if I never shared my voice, what if I never shared my truth? What if I never shared the real true authentic me?
Which one is worse?
Sharing your truth, sharing your YOU and knowing that you showed up with your heart and your mind open? Or never showing up as the real authentic you and being "accepted", "loved" or "seen" even if you can't "see" yourself?
Think about that one..."perfectionism" is all about only showing our "shiny" "perfect" side, only the "light"...no shadow. But that isn't us. The human side of us is something we all share. And when we share our truth, we connect. When someone shares their light AND their shadow, it allows us to feel safe enough to show our light and our shadow too.
Having compassion and finding love and acceptance in feeling all feelings. Knowing that it's okay to feel both EXCITED and SCARED at the same time, both PROUD and INSECURE, both HAPPY and SAD...our feelings are complex. There are layers just like there are layers to each and everyone of us. If we only show one side of things, nobody can really "see" us, ALL of us.
"I don't have to fear my fear, I can use it as a way to get closer to love."
What are the fears coming up for you?
Oftentimes, it goes back to our childhood. What was your childhood like?
Did it feel safe to speak up for yourself?
Could you be loud and be loved? Could you be scared and be loved? Could you be quiet or shy and be loved? Could you cry and feel safe to share your feelings?
What was it like for you and how can you love and accept yourself as you are now, while choosing to love and accept who you were then too?
Was there a time where you tried to speak up, to share your voice, to share your opinion and it didn't go very well? Was there a time where you felt some really big feelings and didn't feel safe to let them be expressed?
What was it that "stifled" you? What was it that made you feel "small"? What was it that stopped you from sharing YOU, from sharing your VOICE, from sharing your truth, from sharing your heart and what it truly wanted to express?
Do you feel safe to share your feelings, even if they feel BIG too?
Did someone tell you to CALM DOWN?...
I just finished watching the Taylor Swift documentary on Netflix...and I highly recommend it! (And I also think it reminds us of our "human-ness", what we all truly share, the feeling we all want to feel and the need to keep speaking up!
I think I shared that same experience of hiding for a while in shame, of not feeling fully "seen" and of needing to feel the feelings and find my own inner voice again.
I know I went through a period of shining my light and not really letting my "shadow" shine either. But the journey is about embodying our "whole" self. Being both the "yin" and the "yang", the masculine and the feminine, the light and the dark.
When we can love and accept all parts of ourselves, we feel "safe" within to be and to show ourselves. To speak up, to share, to be LOUD. (and no, not calm down or make ourselves "smaller" to make others feel more comfortable. )
If we "dim" our light just to fit in, we don't fit in ourselves. If we give ourselves the permission to shine our light and show our dark, we continue to give each other the permission to do the same. And we connect. And connection and love is all that matters.
So please. Don't let anyone stop you from being you, from sharing you. From speaking your truth and sharing your heart. Your soul.
May we continue to find a way, to keep saying how we feel, sharing what we want and not being afraid to ask for it. And knowing we are worthy and deserving of our dreams coming true 💖.
👇🏼 Taken from "Light is the New Black" by Rebecca Campbell